Relationships- An Opportunity to Grow

In this article, I will write about how relationships provide an opportunity for spiritual growth. I am following Lady Master Portia's discourse at a conference. [1]

According to Lady Portia, in our divine plan we choose to incarnate together with our parents, children, and so on. Why? Because our divine plan is designed to help us 'resolve our psychology'.

This allows us to learn lessons together that we both need to learn in order to grow in awareness. However, this does not mean that only one person can help us learn a particular lesson.

As Lady Portia says, «There is always more than one person who can help us learn the same lesson.' What is needed is the willingness to learn.» [2]

This is where things can get complicated because our willingness to learn is closely linked to our level of consciousness.

Mother Mary has previously noted that many people are at a level of consciousness below the 48th level, which is the level at which one begins to grow on planet Earth.

These people do not have a divine plan consciously chosen by themselves, but only a plan created by the masters. However, such people are generally not open to this growth, so the plan is generally not fulfilled.

Lady Portia reinforces this idea, stating that below the 48th level, people are completely identified with the ego. In general, they 'don't want to learn anything' and clash easily with others.

However, when people reach the 48th level, they begin to recognise that not everything in our minds is real or represents our identity. At this point, we recognise others who have the potential to bring forth selves that we need to let die.

This potential obviously applies to both people in the relationship. However, it only reveals itself when each person recognises that they need to change instead of expecting the other person to change so that they 'become okay'.

As Lady Portia says, 'It's not always easy, especially at levels above 48, mainly because the person has a very strong focus on the self'.» [3]

The main problem in all relationships is the self-centred focus that projects the idea that 'the other person' is the cause of all troubles and that these could be overcome if only that person changed.

However, as Lady Portia states, 'It's possible that they believe it's the other person who needs to change, but it's also possible that this person is unable to relate to themselves.» [4]

And why can’t they relate to themselves? Because there is interference between their true identity and that of the other person. This interference is the outer self, or the ego.

The ego can only focus its attention externally. It doesn't have a real identity, but it does have a focus: the 'me' as a mortal being with a temporary identity created to live in the world of form.

The ego is self-centred and unable to relate to anyone other than itself. It projects the idea that it is always 'right', that its view of things is the 'correct' view, and that it is the other person who is unable to see this.

The ego is, by definition, divided; it is a creation of dualistic consciousness, so it's no wonder that people, especially those in close relationships, continually shock each other with their opposing views and opinions.

Only one type of consciousness is able to relate to others without superimposing its own view on them: the Christ consciousness. However, this requires people to transcend their external self and access the Christ mind through their 'conscious you'.

Real relationships cannot happen until people are committed to connecting with their spiritual identity. When we 'relate' to others through the ego, we can only see our own needs and express dissatisfaction when the other person does not submit to them.

We can even believe that we have made so many concessions to the other person that they should be grateful for them.

However, this is the nature of a business transaction, not a genuine relationship capable of reaching out to another person unconditionally. This is only possible within the mind of Christ.

This is why what most people call 'human love' has nothing to do with true love in reality. If we want to experience love on earth, it is time to realise that it is worthwhile leaving behind the illusory mind of the ego and accessing the mind that has always been ours, but from which we have chosen to distance ourselves: the mind of Christ. This will surely not disappoint us.

[1] «Locking in to Your Divine Plan, through the messenger Kim Michaels, March 2025

[2] Id., From my notes on the discourse.

[3] Ibid.

[4] Ibid.